A lot of people ask me what I like to do with my free time when they’re trying to get to know me. I’ll always say I like to watch TV, listen to music, hang out with friends, go shopping, go to the gym, and do my makeup. Pretty typical girl.
But I also like to write blogs. What kind of blogs?
Literally anything. I can write about anything, and I’ve always been that way. My teachers and parents will tell you that I used to write full on books at the age of 6. I was always reading multiple books a day. I’ve just always been super into literature and got the best grades in language arts all throughout elementary, middle and high school. In elementary, I really thought I was going to be an author when I grew up, because I was always writing.
Then, in middle school, I got super into computer studies. Remember in middle school and high school when students had their core classes, and 3 “options” classes? Most people chose Foods, Drama, and Art as theirs. Mine were Literature Arts & Communication, Computer Programming, and Fashions. It was a weird combination of interests that I never thought would cross paths, but genuinely the only things I had interest in. That being said, I started to struggle in middle school with what I thought I really wanted my career to be, now that I had this new passion, which was computer studies.
In high school, I want to say grade 11, I got into makeup. I loved doing my own makeup, I would watch endless makeup tutorials on YouTube, and I wanted to start my own. I was 16 years old when I started my first YouTube channel (lmfao). Nobody knew about it. It was straight up just me using my dad’s digital camera and filming in my room and I would post it up, barely edited, no lighting, no music, the worst audio imaginable. Tragic.
Then it got real, and in grade 12 I had to start thinking about what I really wanted to do with my life, and what I wanted to go to post-secondary schooling for. I knew I wanted to go straight into college or university but I genuinely had no idea what for. Do I want to go to beauty school? Do I want to be an author/writer??? A computer tech girl???? I have no fucking idea.
After sitting down with my parents, I decided to go to college for Multimedia Production. Most people have no idea what that is when I tell them that’s what I went to school for, so I’m just going to tell you: This area of study includes graphic design, digital video production, 2D and 3D animation, interactive presentation, digital photography, digital image manipulation, branding, electronic layout and publishing, interface design, web design, audio mixing, and communication arts.
Basically, it has everything to do with digital media. Basically, I’m a nerd.
I ultimately chose the Multimedia Production route because it’s exactly what it sounded like: multi-media. It was a variety of subjects mixed into one program (which was literally me my entire life). I was interested in the graphic design and animation part because I’ve always been really creative. I was interested in the interactive presentation and the digital video and audio production because I was interested in editing software, and how I could better my YouTube videos. And I was obviously interested in the communication arts aspect of it. I just thought it had the best combination of learning tools that I could use for every single one of my random interests.
And that it did; after graduating, I now know how to build my own websites, edit videos, edit audio, create animations, create graphic designs, and I have advanced knowledge in all things Adobe programming. So where does that get me? Sure, I could easily get a job as designer/developer for a company, or even be a freelancer. However, I really just wanted to do my own thing.
In the last semester of college, our teachers encouraged us to start our own portfolio. A website where we can showcase our multimedia talent online. I used that opportunity to make a blog. I started my first blog 3 years ago. It was a lifestyle and beauty blog and I loved it. I found a way to combine everything I’ve always loved: beauty, writing, and computer studies. Finally, my life came full circle and I was the happiest I’d ever been. I was branding myself, working with other brands, doing what I loved to do. I actually gained quite a large following from it. But then I just stopped.
Blogging was always my own world. Nobody in my real life knew about it, and I wanted to keep it that way. I was embarrassed to share it with even my closest friends and family. I don’t know, I just felt like they would make fun of me, because it’s not a “regular job.” I live in a small town where people wouldn’t take that seriously. I also wrote about things that I didn’t neccesarily want them to see. It was for my followers, not my friends and family.
I stopped as soon as people in my real life started to hear about it. I literally panicked and deleted everything, including my YouTube channel with a good number of subscribers. Obviously, I wish I never did that, and I feel bad because I never gave my readers an explanation. I just vanished. The only thing I kept of mine was my Instagram, because at that point it had become such a huge platform that people were going to find me on it regardless. People used to comment on my photos “what happened to your blog?” and I would delete the comment immediately. Like, I didn’t want anyone to know that I ever had a blog because I thought it was nerdy, and I didn’t know anyone else who had a blog at that time so I thought people would make fun of me. People always asked me “how do you have so many followers on Instagram?” and I would just lie and say I didn’t know.
I miss it so much. Blogging and connecting with people online was the only thing that got me through a tough day. It was my escape, and I let my own insecurities overpower my passion and it took me up until now to truly forgive myself for it. But I used my time-off to truly revamp, and I even started opening up to a few people about it and learned that so many people from this small town actually share the same love for blogging as I do and it’s nothing to be insecure about. So I’m starting from scratch, but I’m back now!
I want you all to see how far I’ve come and stay tuned to my NEW and improved blog. More details to come 😉