My Thoughts on Tinder and Online Dating

1. tin·der

ˈtindər/
app

A dating app in which 95% of the guys are looking for casual sex or nudes to jack off to, and 95% of the girls are either looking for bae or just want to make friends… resulting in pretty much consistent disappointment and frustration for both parties…

Kinda like real life.

 

I seriously give props to the founder of Tinder and their ability to profit off of today’s simplistic society.

Seriously, all Tinder is is a gentrification of millennials and what we all already know about all of us: we’re all shallow as fuck. And all we know how to do is swipe on our phones.

We only want to get to know others based on their looks first, and their social status second. So what Tinder does, is (if you guys don’t know what Tinder is…) it’s an app where you get to come across a bunch of people’s profiles or “cards” within your location, and swipe right (like) or left (not interested), given only their name, age, and best pictures.

There are two types of people on Tinder:

#1: *swipes right continuously, hoping for the best*

#2: *swipes left continuously, finds a guy who’s kind of cute, checks out his name, looks at his age, makes sure he’s mature enough, reads his bio, says he he doesn’t just want to hook up, of course he’s being honest, looks at his linked Instagram page, creeps his Instagram, creeps his friends tagged in his Instagram, finally comes across something I don’t like, goes back to Tinder, swipes left*

Guess which one I am.

 

As many of you know, it takes a lot for me to be interested in a guy, so while I had Tinder for roughly five days, I literally swiped right to about 6 guys, and had 5 matches. That’s a pass, right?

So with 5 matches out of 1006 left swipes, I dubbed it as a total waste of time before I even got to meet any of these guys. The single and only motivation I had to go out and actually meet any of them, was to defy this conclusion. I couldn’t be too negative. Maybe I could justify my exhausted left-swiping finger with a potential boo.

Long story short, I really should’ve just trusted my first judgement.

One of the guys hit me up and wanted to hang out. I’m thinking, okay, this is about to be my first date, he’s going to want to take me out somewhere and have fun, maybe go bowling… I’ve always wanted to go on a date. Butterflies just thinking about it. Whatever.

This dude wanted me to go to his house. But I’ve never dated or had Tinder before so I was like, is this what people do? I didn’t think much of it so I went. We had been talking for like a month prior, and he was actually my favourite out of all of my matches. He was so nice, seemed genuine and respectful, and obviously, I wouldn’t go to his house for the first time meeting if I didn’t feel like it was 100% safe.

So we sat in his living room and talked, watched tv, giggled at our height difference, and drank wine. It was a short visit, as he had to work the next morning, but I liked him, and wouldn’t mind hanging out again (when I wasn’t on a scale of 1-10, broke the scale nervous).

Which we did; we hung out a few more times. I was starting to feel like he could be my very first guy that I would actually consider dating.

But then he just ghosted on me. I don’t really know why still to this day. Thank God I didn’t like him enough to really care, but I was just confused. But me being the type of girl I am, if you want to ghost, I’m not going to chase you. I swear to God I’d be the dopest ex. I’d leave you alone for good.

Like I said, it wasn’t like we had spent enough time with each other for me to go ballistic over him ghosting. The only way it affected me was for so long I thought there was something wrong with me and my mind must’ve exploded with what it could be. It sucked because I just felt like it was a complete waste of time and feelings. Which, brings me back to my first conclusion that I should’ve listened to.

 

But my FINAL conclusion about Tinder is: If you’re like me and you require attention, communication, and respect, don’t waste your time, sis. Meet somebody the old-fashioned way or stop complaining about being single. My theory is this: the guy I met had no respect for me or sympathy about ghosting because he probably meets hundreds of girls on Tinder. He has to ghost on at least 50 of them. If you want a guy who’s going to respect you enough to at least communicate with you, you have to meet him in a more respectable way. If I had to explain to each and every one of the thousand guys that I swiped left to on Tinder why I wasn’t interested, my breath would be just as exhausted as my finger was.

If you are going to go on Tinder, though, understand that guys who are on there aren’t picky at all. They don’t realize when they’ve met a girl who’s one in a million, because he literally swipes right a million times.

And if you’re going to meet a guy off Tinder, my advice is A) make him take you out, don’t go to his house first unless your intentions are as sleazy as his, and B) be prepared to get ghosted on the second they get another match. It’s just the logistics of Tinder. Guys on there have the attention span of a goldfish. Don’t go on there if you tend to not move on quick.

That being said, Tinder just isn’t for me. I knew it wasn’t before I got sucked into trying it, but I definitely know now.

I recommend Tinder for these types of people only:

  • people who are just trying to hook up
  • people who have expectations that they truly think they can achieve (there are some success stories out there)
  • people who are just on there to network and gain more followers (I did get tons of followers)
  • good girls who love getting disappointed
  • people with not that high of standards
  • men.

2. tin·der

ˈtindər/
noun

dry, flammable material, such as wood or paper, used for lighting a fire.

 

And I leave you with that definition. Because my experience with Tinder was dry as fuck.

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